For the past 2 nights I have had 4 dreams, two each night. I would usually be quite excited about this because I don't normally remember my dreams past waking BUT...in these dreams I was quite Angry! Now I wouldn't say that I am never ever annoyed or angry because I am human and I am quite passionate as well, lol ;) But I would say that I am not generally such an angry person that I feel rage often or have to continually deal with steam coming from my ears on a regular basis...AND I def don't dream angry dreams one after the other for two nights straight normally! So this morning I laid in bed, snuggling Gunthy & Leisel..and Tom too :), and I thought about the fact that maybe I am quite angry about some things in my life that I am holding in without being aware that I am experiencing them. I also noticed that in these dreams there was a reoccurring emotion or certain way I kept feeling over and over again but these feeling were playing out in different dream scenarios. So that has to be a huge clue as to what direct feelings may be causing some of my hidden anger! Nonetheless, today I thought I would like to make a list of helpful ways of Managing Anger in my own life (seeing as I have so much, lol!) so that I am not repressing these feeling of mine. Also, I don't like the feeling of waking up from dreams like these and having these be my first thoughts of the day, my heart actually seriously hurt after I woke in the morning! No No No :( So here is what I came up with...
1. Learn to recognize signals that you are feeling or becoming angry about something. Knowing triggers can allow you to start to familiarize yourself with what the problem actually is so you can learn to then deal with it. Once you know the cause you can treat it. Breathing in and out deeply, walking away and meditating someplace immediately after you feel anger surfacing, strolling in nature, sitting on the grass or in the sun to ground yourself can really help.
2. Start paying attention to what you are attracting to yourself with your thoughts. Are you actually attracting some of this anger by these thoughts? If you are you can train your thinking patterns and start to strengthen your ability to shift these unhelpful thoughts before they can take shape...it's a practiced skill but very possible to change and helpful to become aware of.
3. Communication...is it possible that instead of causing waves with the people you are close with you are self-sacrificing your own happiness & self-care by keeping these feelings inside? It's quite possible! But it isn't fair to yourself, especially for your long term well being. People that love us want to make us happy and surprisingly want to know what makes us feel great & also what really hurts us. Communicating to others in a calm way regularly, with respect & love of course, is an amazing pattern to form in life.
4. Sometimes the company we choose can uplift us or drag us down...it is possible to be around others that dump their energy onto us like their "garbage day" and cause us to absorb their anger. Sometimes what we're feeling for the rest of the week is actually their anger! Recognizing when the energy that we are feeling isn't our own can help us to be able to block out other people's angry energy without taking it on as our own.
5. Having an Attitude of Gratitude daily is a great ritual to have, esp upon rising. I'm going to try having a list that I look at and add to that I read daily...I truly have so much to be thankful for!
6. LAUGH! Find things to laugh at and lighten your mood. My kids, my Tom, my Dogs make me laugh a lot because they are so funny when I genuinely focus on them...I also LOVE comedy, Demetri Martin is one of my FAV comedians to watch after a long day to just have a good laugh. Funny Memes are always hilarious to flip through too :)
7. Forgive others...even when they don't say sorry or own up to hurting you. This is easier said than done but when you practice empathizing with those people and their situations you can almost always bail them out of being angry with them all on your own. Sometimes when you empathize you really can start to understand why people behave the way they do in their lives. It may take time but like anything you become better at it when you practice it a lot. Seek closure for yourself and don't let bitterness turn into hate or anger by letting yourself stew in those poisonous feelings.
8. Focus on YOU...what makes you happy, what interests you, what do you want for your life. Focusing on your life instead of taking responsibility and ownership over what others do in their lives is freeing and so gratifying! It saves your energy for your own ventures and enables you to become more exciting and interesting as a person in the process :)
I hope that helped anybody else who feels this way from time to time...here's to Sweet Dreams & Happiness Friends! Mwah xo
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